Dear Refuge of My Weary Soul....

This past week has been one of those in which we have experienced a roller coaster of emotions ranging from elation to fear. It is during the times of fear that my heart begins the process of disengagement from the One who loves me more than I can comprehend. I hear of yet another consequence of the Fall, and I once again allow my circumstances to define God. Though I despise it, I allow my heart to become detached from Him and feelings of abandonment take over. I have wrestled with this for quite sometime now, and it is to me, the worst thing on this side of Eternity. I am so thankful for His amazing grace to love and pursue me in the midst of my fear and doubt. He is faithful to minister to my brokenness as only He can. In Worship today we sang a song written by Anne Steele and composed by Kevin Twitt titled, Dear Refuge of My Weary Soul. It practically brought me to tears as I feel like it so beautifully expresses the longing and struggle of my heart to cling to Jesus in the midst of trial. If you are struggling to cling to Him, our only Hope, I pray He may encourage your heart through these words today.


Dear refuge of my weary soul on Thee when sorrows rise.
On Thee when waves of trouble toll, My fainting hope relies.
To Thee I tell each rising grief, For Thou alone canst heal
Thy word can bring a sweet relief For every pain I feel.

But oh! when gloomy doubts prevail, I fear to call Thee mine
The springs of comfort seem to fail, and all my hopes decline.
Yet gracious God where shall I flee? Thou art my only trust
And still my soul would cleave to Thee Thou prostrate in the dust.

Hast Thou not bid me seek thy face, And shall I seek in vain?
And can the ear of Sovereign grace Be deaf when I complain?
No still the ear of Sovereign grace, Attends the mourner's prayer
Oh may I ever find access, To breath my sorrows there.

Thy mercy seat is open still, Here let my soul retreat
With humble hope, attend thy will, and wait beneath Thy feet
Thy mercy seat is open still, Here let my soul retreat
With humble hope attend Thy will,
And wait beneath Thy feet.

Looking back....

Well, it has been one year since the beginnings of our hospital visits. This blog is at least one year old and has been a great reminder of God's work in our lives. God has been helping us to continue to live by faith as we live each day for him. Some days are harder than others, due to anxiety, stress, and temptation. Other days, we clearly see the Lord's hand and blessings in our life. I know for myself (Dale), this past year brought times of questioning God, His purposes and plan for our lives. It has been a year of tumultuous change for us. Through it all, God is bringing both Beth and I to grow in relying only upon Him and to know His redeeming, unchanging, compassionate steadfast love for us. There have been moments where this has been overwhelming to the point of tears, but one person put it, it seems to be God short circuiting the ways that have been turned against Him for so long.

Beth and I do thank you all so much for your prayers this past year. We do covet your prayers as we continue down this journey. This upcoming year will be filled with much more adventure I do not doubt. Lord willing, we will be able to update this a little bit more often to allow you to walk with us. Take care and talk with you real soon!

Dale

Called to St. Louis but Longing to Be in Virginia....

In my last entry, I had mentioned the difficult news we have received about Angie's health. I wake up every morning and go to bed every night burdened beyond words for my best friend and her family as they face this reality in their lives. It takes everything in me to stay here in St. Louis when I want nothing more than to pack my bag and start driving home to be with her. Of course, being so teary eyed these days, I don't know if I would be of much assistance in providing an emotionally stable environment.:) So until the timing is right, I will stay here and continue to labor in prayer over her life and the lives of her husband and children.

I am very grateful for Brian's willingness to keep us updated through their blog at the following address: www.springofjoy.org. I would invite you to read it and enter into their world so that as the Lord leads you, you could know how to best care for them during this time. I know they are grateful for the love that so many have already expressed to them.

I am thankful for this season the Lord has called us to St. Louis. He has done so much on our behalf! And yet in times like these, I want nothing more than to be in Virginia. Thankfully one day in Heaven we will truly be at Home together, never to have to depart again. (and if our house is by the Davis, ours will be the messy one.) :)

Thank you so much for praying...

Dearest Family and Friends,

It has obviously been a while since we have updated our blog...bless your hearts for being so faithful to continue to check it and pray. We have been loved so well through you. Thank you so much for the countless prayers, phone calls, e-mails, and cards. It is my desire at this point to ask you in joining me in praying for my best friend, Angie. She has been diagnosed this week with breast cancer. It deeply pains my heart not to be home in VA and right by her side....but the Lord is and I know He is loving her so well through her family and our home church.

We love you and are again, eternally grateful for you. We would continue to ask you to pray for us as the struggle with physical pain and anxiety persists, especially after hearing about Angie's health,and for Dale, as he serves in his new position at Twin Oaks Pres.

Love you!
Beth

Room Correction

Due to the latex allergy, they put Beth in her own room. She is in 626. Her phone number is 314-567-2626. She is doing okay overall, however she is extremely hungry and unable to eat anything. We may see the GI doctor this afternoon, if not today then tomorrow morning. There is question if they are going to do the endoscopy or not. The risk is associated with her on the coumadin. The problem is that this test seems to be what needs to be performed because they potentially will do biopsies when they are down there. The fear is that because of the coumadin, the places where they take the biopsies will bleed and not clot. So, we need to pray for the doctors to do the test while she is on the coumadin and that there will be no effects from the biopsies.

Welcome to Hotel St. John

We are being admitted to room 623 at St. John's Mercy Medical Center.

Dale

Noon update

We got notified recently from the doctor that Beth will be admitted to the hospital. We will let you know where we are when we move from the ER. The GI doctor will look at the schedule and probably attempt an endoscopy sometime tomorrow. Beth is doing okay at this point. They tried to give her some crackers and she can't get them down due to the burning sensations in her throat and esophagus. We have a friend here with us which is very helpful. This is the information I have at this point. Like I said, she is doing better in terms of her spirits and physical well-being due to having some IV fluids in her. Please continue to pray. Thank you.