5th time to the ER

So, as I was writing the previous blog and actually got some sleep in the waiting room, my wife was in getting her CT scan done. Little did I know that upon being injected with the needed dye for the scan, she began to have an anxiety attack. They were able to get the scan complete, for which we are thankful. However, upon finishing she believed she was having an allergic reaction to the dye and began to have the worst attack yet. They proceeded to give her some Benadryl to stop any potential reaction. She became lethargic, which was expected and then got more worried. It took a while, but she finally began to calm down and we were prepping to go home. We actually closed the place down and they had to give us the choice of going home or going to the ER. They were prepping the ER for our arrival, but we decided to come home. As we were doing so, we were about a quarter of the way home when she began to have chest pain that was shooting down from her neck. Needless to say, we were concerned, so I turned around and headed back to the ER.

So, here we sit. The ER doctor has seen her and does not seemed concerned. Beth at this point has calmed down pretty much and is sleepy. She has finally gotten a little something to eat, but is still definitely hungry. They gave her some tylenol for the pain, because she refused the drug they offered which would take the pain away, but also make her sleepy in addition. They took some blood to check her coumadin level just to be sure. She also said that she would consult with her doctors in regards to the pain that Beth has been experiencing. We probably will be going home tonight, but at this point we are unsure of that. The doctors are not alarmed or majorly concerned, so that is why I believe we will be going home shortly. Hopefully we will find out something soon and go home.

So, please continue to pray.....As our pastor reminded us this afternoon, may God continue to be our shield and protector, may He be our glory and may He be our encourager when we are in despair, just as He was with David in Psalm 3. Blessings to you.

Doctor's visit on Thursday

So we are at the doctor's today. In fact, I am here in the waiting room while Beth gets another CT scan. Dr. Kreikemeier (GI doctor) wanted to do this scan in order to check her abdomen and such for any irregularities. This is only a precaution, but nonetheless we are here back in the hospital! He has also asked her to get some blood work to check for something that may be causing the anxiety attacks. He actually said that this stuff for which he is checking gives the symptoms of anxiety attacks, but it is not really anxiety. As well, he has referred us to a "mobility" specialist who is quite familiar and knowledgeable about the esophagus. We are hoping that she may have something to suggest in regards to what is going on with Beth's pain. PLEASE PRAY! for a soon appointment. He mentioned that she is VERY hard to get an appointment with soon, so it may be a couple months before seeing her. You can imagine that hearing this was frustrating considering the situation. We know that God has the ability and capacity to make that appointment sooner, so we will pray! The doctor has given her a prescription for the same little blue pills that she received in the hospital. We are hoping that a return to that may help as well. He has also given her a green light to begin eating anything that she feels like eating, including milk substances. He has continued the precaution of eating anything too spicy. So, we will continue to pray that as she begins to eat normal or at least different foods that she will be able to eat pain free. I believe there is a connection between her not being able to eat consistently or well due to the pains, her anxiety, and the possibility that the medicines react the way they do. The problem is I am not a doctor and I may be completely wrong about that. But, it is a thought.

So, those are my thoughts for the day. It was definitely good to see the doctor today and speak with him about these issues. It was also good to catch up with a friend personally today. No doubt, this has been a hard, long road. I am very tired! Thank you for your prayers, love, and support. It is encouraging to read your comments, listen to your voice mails, and to see you face-to-face. Thank you for being the tangible presence of Christ's body to us as we go through this. THANK YOU!

Saying goodbye to friends...

We have said goodbye to two of our good friends recently, namely the Caricos and the Ortlunds. It has been a sad two days saying goodbye to these dear friends. Both of these families are going to be used mightily by the Lord through the gifts that He has given them. What an amazing testimony to how God works in people's life in different ways to minister, guide, and shepherd His people. Beth and I are truly grateful to have been a part of their lives while here at Seminary.

As well, this past weekend, we had some dear visitors from Virginia, namely the Davis family. We had a blast while they were here, even as we battled through pain and anxiety. What a blessing and encouragement for us to visit with them and be blessed by the energy and presence of our friends and their children: Asher, Micah, and Audrey. I got to go to the zoo with the boys and their father on Saturday. What a treat! I think they ought to make a coffeehouse environment in part of the zoo, surround it with plexiglass or some barrier, put internet access in there. What a place to study! This was truly a sweet time to be refreshed by good 'ole friends!

Ups and Downs

Well the past week has been characterized by ups and downs. We have our good days and we have our bad days. The pattern however is leaning more and more towards continual bad days. The pain in Beth's esophagus continues to return and become more intense. We are at the point tonight where the heaviness in her chest has returned. It so happens that this was the same heaviness that was present when we were in the hospital before. It seems to me that the medicine which she is taking seems to no longer being effective. It does seem that she is regressing, which is very hard to swallow. (No pun intended!) The sensation of food getting stuck continues or has returned and gotten worse. So, there is something going on and we can't see anyone until Thursday afternoon at our scheduled appointment. They have upped her dosage of the nighttime medicine which was to help the spasms, however since they have done that the symptoms keep getting worse. This makes me wonder. Over the previous weekend we greatly struggled through moments of anxiety.

So, we just ask that you continue to pray. Thank you for your continued care for us as we go through this. It has definitely been taxing on both of us, especially in those intense moments when we don't know if we should return to the hospital or not. Please pray for endurance, patience, wisdom, and relief from this pain. Please pray for both of us spiritually as well, that we would be see the Lord's work and hand on us as we go through this. There certainly are times when it is hard to grab hold of hope.

Well, thank you for listening, praying, reading. It is good to read your comments when you write. Thank you for the encouragement.

MEALS - How you can help!

If you are willing to offer a meal to us during this time, we would greatly appreciate it. If you are interested, please call Stacy Ortlund at 314-428-3337. She has offered to spear head this for us.

Thank you again for your help, support, encouragement, and love during this time. Please do continue to pray as we learn how to love and take care of one another during this time. Thank you!

Life on the other side....

Well, this is what life on the other side was like for us this week:
Beth's mom left Monday afternoon and things were pretty quiet after she left. We continued on the road of recovery and resting. We began to fully understand what life was going to take in regards to slowing down in the pace of life.

Tuesday, we saw Beth's new primary care physician. We were thankful because she seemed very gracious and understanding of Beth's condition. She answered our numerous questions about the various drugs she is on and the potential interactions with each other and food. She also was able to prescribe something that helps more long term to help with Beth's episodes of anxiety. The doctor also changed her coumadin dosage per the results from the blood test the previous Friday.

Wednesday was her first day back at work. Beth's principal has been gracious and allowing her to return only for half days. The kids definitely missed her, but they began to get reacquainted with her. She came home and slept. Before doing this she took one of her new meds from the previous day at the doctor. Later that evening, after I had left for rehearsal, Beth had to call a friend to come over and sit with her for a while. She was feeling very drowsy and didn't trust being alone. We certainly are very thankful for our friends who have been gracious with us during this process and helping us out in the various ways. There was no more concern the rest of the night.

Thursday and Friday was the beginning of our somewhat busy weekend, which we realized is too much energy for one weekend. Thursday evening we went to her end of the year school program. The Freedom School is such a blessing to those kids where they hear about the Lord Jesus Christ and His love for this world. The program was on the character of God. It was quite interesting at times, but what a blessing to be reminded of who God is by those kids. Truly...How Great Is Our God! Friday evening, we went to our second graduation. We saw several of our good friends graduate, especially our cousin Tim Jones. CONGRATULATIONS! It was a blessing to see our Covenant family again at the reception and the little party that evening at a friend's house.

Today was filled again with excitement. Beth's school's Field Day got canceled, so we enjoined staying home and resting. Around 12 noon Beth proceeded to get anxious and tried to eat something in order to take some medicine. However, this time she proceeded to be troubled again with pains in her esophagus as she ate. We suffered through this and the anxiety attack by rubbing her back and attempting to decipher what was going on. She took some Xanax to help calm her down a little bit and took a nap for the afternoon. Upon waking she was not much better in regards to the pain. After deliberation, we ended back in the ER earlier this evening, attempting to figure out what was going on. The doctor reviewed all the records from the hospital visitations before and concluded that there was not much else they could do for her at this time without her seeing the GI doctor again. They did prescribe a carafate drink for her, which was actually ordered for her while in the hospital but never given. This drink is for patients who struggle with ulcers, however Beth does not have an ulcer. So, at this point she is a sleep for the night, resting quietly. Unfortunately, the events of the day have prevented us from attending two graduation parties, which included Tim's, our cousin, and some time with Beth's prayer group for one final reunion. Tomorrow will be a quiet morning for us here, hopefully working on staying pain free.

One thing is for sure we both are mentally and emotionally exhausted from this endeavor. Beth and I both are longing for her to be free from this and desire for her to be healthy again. You all have been so gracious to continue emailing, praying, calling, and hoping for the best in our situation. Sometimes it is very hard to answer the question, "How are you doing?" Speaking for myself, I don't even know which end is up. I listened to myself respond to Beth today and I began to question if I am the right person to be helping her through this. I was able to speak with our uncle this afternoon and was remarking at how I believe after everything we have been through with Beth, my sister and her tragedy, and other things in the past three weeks I have shut myself down emotionally because I seemingly have nowhere to turn. I am unsure of how much more I can take. It is definitely harder when you feel isolated by all this pain.

So, we ask for you to continue to pray. Thank you for being with us in this, reading these posts, and encouraging us along the way to hold fast. Please pray for God to bring healing, restoration, and hope into our midst.

Monday update

Well, things have begun to really quiet down here now. The long road of recovery and adjusting is upon us. Beth's mom left earlier today and the house has become less busier. We definitely miss her support, encouragement, and love through out this time. We are finding that the morning tends to be the worst time for Beth in regards to being anxious. Thankfully, Beth will not attempt to go back to school until Wednesday and then she will only be there a half a day. She definitely misses her friends and talking on the phone with them. The one thing she has noticed is that she does get tired quickly doing that and has gotten anxious during the conversation. We haven't quite figured that out yet, but please know that if she doesn't call back, that is why. We have learned that we need to pace her day a little to moderate the activity, otherwise she is pushed and then gets anxious. She indicated to me earlier before her nap that she wanted to communicate to you all how blessed she feels by all your love and support through this ordeal in everything that you have done. Thank you as well for being gracious with us as we go through this and begin to learn how to live on this side of the hospital. No doubt, things will look different. They already do.

Please continue to pray for both of us as we do this. Please pray that I would be able to refocus back on school. I am pretty worn down right now from everything we have been through. Without going into details, please pray for my sister, Yvonne and her husband Rick. They have been through a very rough time this past week and need to be comforted with the peace that only Christ can offer them in the wake of a tragedy.

As for more practical needs...I know at some point meals would be helpful. We still have a refrigerator full of stuff from Beth's dad who went shopping for us. It may be helpful to have some one come and help me clean out the frig so we know what end is up. Visitors for Beth, we will have to moderate. I know she desperately wants to talk with friends and get reacquainted, however is learning how to limit her activities for the sake of her energy.

Again, we extend our sincere appreciation for all your help, support, and encouragement. We pray that God would continue to bless you as you have been a blessing to us. Take care and talk with you soon.